Can't stop what's coming

One day all all have left are my bones
and the memory of your scent in the dark
and when you ask me to hand them over I will


When your pain subsides
Our only fondness will be to your quiet freedom
Your declarations of love always have the same price
A drink too much
And a mouth too sweet to ever be able to appreciate
A girl too impatient to love you anymore

Departure, 5 hours and counting.


Now here I go again I see the crystal visions

Teddy bears and sleeping pills
Help me calm the way I feel
Frays the thoughts I don't want to think
Makes me forget the bits that can't be filled
And gulp gulp
A little nap and little drink
Come close while I care
What ever gets me outta here
Whatever train that's going
Is gonna take me there
I give
I know what I give
I know what I give you when I don't put up a fight
Sleeping pills and teddy bears
Yea they're good for a little bit
So that I don't contemplate it too long
So I can learn to not give a shit
I gave
I know what I gave
I know what I gave you
Know that it doesn't make me wrong
Though we know it wasn't right
I can't remember the last time I fell for this
But I've got the bruises on my knees
As evidence
As fresh as last night
But I've got something in me now
That's gonna calm the way I feel
Soften the edges that you left rough
Much worse than I should have ever allowed
Gotta drag myself out of the darkness again
Drag myself into the light
I know what I gotta kick
I know what I gotta kick to stop being ill
A sickness that is charging now
It's bloated overdue bill
Pull me through the gates of horn, Morpheus
With a teddy bear and a sleeping pill


And now your secrets keep me up at night

Tonight drag me off, Morpheus
With a teddy bear and a sleeping pill


Pleasures remain/So does the pain/Words are meaningless/And forgettable

Tell you what you want to hear
Feed your vacant heart
Arrange varying degrees of undress
A war of worlds and thoughts
You tortured
And then set me free
Made me question my life
What is punishment
And what is philosophy
The fine line like a filament
Between bitterness
And poetry


Thanks, Rob

Sagittarius (November 22-December 21)
There come times in your life when you have a sacred duty to be open to interesting tangents and creative diversions; times when it makes sense to wander around aimlessly with wonder in your eyes and be alert for unexpected clues that grab your attention. But this is not one of those times, in my opinion. Rather, you really do need to stay focused on what you promised yourself you would concentrate on. The temptation may be high to send out sprays of arrows at several different targets. But I hope that instead you stick to one target and take careful aim with your best shots.

Sometimes I need reminders of how to get my shit together.



Hide yourself in someone else, don't find yourself in me.

I forgive you Magdalena
For all of the bad ideas
The love you so desperately desired
You felt drain out so slowly
You watched navigate around
And somehow filter through you
I forgive you Magdalena
For taking me along for the ride
You thought it would be fun and it was
For a while
Until what once create fantastic friction
Created a fire that you could not put out
And I was in the middle
Like a witch at the stake
I release you from it all
From the lapses in judgment
The terrible mistakes
I cut the strands of hair that still mark where you were
Where you've stood
Where you've laid
tear marked
I shred the ribbons they tried to bind you with
You were a butterfly
They all tried to catch you in their net
And they succeeded, some of them
But then you played dead
And they set you aside
The minute they turned away
You started to fly
Magdalena, I pull the pins that tore your wings
A harsh victory
A glorious mess
A bittersweet memory
I absolve you Magdalena
Of all of the things you swallowed
All of the things you hid
Manifestations of the things you were denied
Real or make believe
Nothing more to confess
I forgive you for everything
Maladies by your hand
And what they did in turn
I release you
Sleep tonight
I forgive you Magdalena

I forgive you